5 FAQ’s for Eloping With Family & Friends
For many couples considering an adventure elopement, one of the biggest concerns is how to involve their loved ones. Eloping doesn’t necessarily have to mean it’s just the two of you. In fact, we LOVE when couples bring the people who mean the most to them along to celebrate with us! 😍
The whole point of an elopement is to keep the day intimate and intentional. And there are many ways to do that and also get your friends and family involved.
We hear so many questions about eloping with family and friends, so it’s about time we wrote a blog post answering them!
Is there a magic number of guests for eloping with family?
Truthfully, there is no hard and fast rule about how many people you can have at an elopement. Having said that, though, there is an upper limit you should have in order to keep your day intentional. In our experience, that number is 10-15 guests MAX. Any more than that, and there will probably be the added stress of planning and logistics that can distract from the day being entirely about the commitment you’re making.
Think of it this way: say you’re eloping with family and friends, and you want to take your crew off-roading or hiking before your sunset ceremony (which you absolutely should do! 🙌) or you all want to stay in one vacation rental home together. These things are exponentially easier with a small group, not to mention the fact that it allows you to spend quality time with every single person in attendance.
2. How does the ceremony work without an officiant?
This is one of the most common questions we hear, and it’s a great one!
First, Mal’s ordained, which means she can legally sign as the officiant present for your wedding and file all the paperwork for you afterward. But she’ll actually be double-fisting cameras to capture this part of the day, which means the couple will share their vows and rings with one another personally. With friends and family along, this could be a bit awkward to start off. However, with a simple intro welcoming your guests, diving into the other elements of your ceremony will feel pretty natural! Here’s a sweet example of what one of our grooms said to guests before exchanging vows and rings in front of them:
“I personally want to thank each of you for making the trip out here to join us and for being a part of this very special day. We chose to keep things small with the ones who mean the most to us, the ones we love, and that’s you guys. With that said, we’re going to get right into it with the exchange of vows, rings, and hopefully minimal tears.”
We also see many couples who want their closest friends and family to be their witnesses or officiate their elopement. This is a wonderful way to involve your loved ones when eloping with family and friends!
Alternatively, you can opt for the best of both worlds — have Mal sign and file as the official ordained witness, but ask a friend to orchestrate a cute lil ceremony for ya. You could also have guests say a few words about your relationship or even play a song that reminds them of you.
Shawn and Jon chose to have their daughter lead their ceremony. Her script was thoughtful, funny, and had everyone in tears including BOTH Mal and Halie😂.
INTRO
Ruth 1:16 reads “Where you go I will go, and where you stay I will stay. Your people will be my people and your God my God.” Whew! We finally made it to Colorado. Who would have thought that initial encounter at Marlow’s Tavern three and half years ago would have led to this very moment. Well, the bartender working that day may have had a clue when she forever cemented the nickname “Sean John” after innocently asking their names. I on the other hand was not as clued in when it took me several months to piece together “Sean John” was not the name of my mother’s new boyfriend whose name in fact was just “Jon”. No matter how they got here, we all stand here today to celebrate the undeniable love they share and the joining of our families.
VOWS
There are 3 words that are stronger than I love you. Today, Shawn & Jon stand in front of one another to say ‘I choose you’.
Jon, do you choose Shawn over all others? Do you choose her to share happiness with, to love more each and every day, and to join your life with? Jon, do you choose Shawn to be your wife?
Shawn, do you choose Jon over all others? Do you choose him to share happiness with, to love more each and every day, and to join your life with? Shawn, do you choose Jon to be your husband?
RINGS
And now for the rings
Jon, repeat after me-
I [Jon]— give you this ring— as a symbol of my love—, to love you today—, tomorrow, always, and forever.
Shawn, repeat after me-
I [Shawn]— give you this ring— as a symbol of my love—, to love you today—, tomorrow, always, and forever.
KISS
And now by the powers I have given myself, in the colorful state of colorado amongst the elk, antelope, and the largest wild turkeys you have ever seen- I now pronounce you husband & wife, here’s to your forever
Need more inspo to send the friend or family member who you want to help ya’ll do this thing? This is Mal’s special templete she wrote to help get your bud’s wheels a turnin…. (we def recommend that they personalize this templete but because we understand, everybody needs somewhere to start…… hopefully this helps!
A Generic Modern Wedding Script Sample by Mal
Officiating Bud:
Good afternoon. [Partner 1], [Partner 2] and I would like to welcome everyone on this B-E-A-utiful day. It’s because of all of you—because of this strong community—[Partner 1] and [Partner 2]’s relationship has strengthened and grown and led them to this epic moment. Thank you for trekking out here to be with us! Now, Let’s friggin DO THIS!
[Partner 1] and [Partner 2], what you’ve accomplished here today is no small feat. Your story began way before you sent out the invites, or chose this dope destination to bring everyone to.
Your story began the moment you first met. You took the time to learn what makes the other person stoked, what makes them laugh, not laugh and how to best support them when life is less than simple. You welcomed each other’s families, communities and lifelong buds, and joined them together with kindness and excitement. You built a new community with your love, and have worked every day to support this community as it changes and grows.
Marriage bring rough days, just as it brings dank ones. This day is a reminder of what your love has already accomplished, and the incredible possibilities of what it can continue to accomplish and overcome in the many, many years ahead of you.
[Partner 1] and [Partner 2], please grab onto each other’s hands, stare DEEPLY into one another’s eyes and repeat after me:
[Partner 1], I swear to you/ that I will dedicate my whole entire life from this day forward/ to filling our days with awesomeness and LOTS of laughter./ I will celebrate your spirit and all of your accomplishments/ work to inspire you/ and be here to remind you of your mad beauty and strength./ I take you today as my partner/ my confidant/ my other half/ and I will love you for the rest of my friggin life.
(Officiant Bud turns to [Partner 2] and repeats the vows)
[Partner 1] and [Partner 2], do you take one another as partners, form this day forward, as husband and wife? Please yell a hearty “HELL YA!”
(Couple says “HELL YA!”)
And to everyone here, do you promise to stand by this couple, to remind them of their vows, and to act as an example of love and family? Please yell a hearty “HELL YA!”
(Crowds says “Hell Ya!”)
Exchange of Rings
[Partner 1] and [Partner 2] have chosen these rings to represent the unbreakable circle of livin and lovin. Please place them on each other’s ring fingers and repeat after me.
I give you this ring/ to remind you of this day/ when in front of our closest peeps [in the middle of this sic desert] or [on top of this epic mountain] or [on this dope ass beach] / we vowed that our love can overcome all the things/ that our love unites, inspires and celebrates/ and will continue do so forever and ever and ever and ever😛
[Partner 1] and [Partner 2], it is with so much stoke and honor that I now send you out into the world to spread the gorgeous light that you share with everybody around you. By the power vested in your Photog Mal, I now, for the first time, pronounce you married. Now kiss already so we can go party!!!!
3. How can we include guests who aren’t exactly...adventurous?
This is more common than you may think! Regardless of how adventurous or experienced you are in the outdoors, the reality is that you’ll probably have people in attendance who simply aren’t. Whether it’s grandparents who physically aren’t able to hike or friends who just aren’t up to climb a mountain, it’s safe to assume not everyone will be on the same level.
The great news is that you don’t have to sacrifice adventure when eloping with family and friends! We can set up your ceremony and have you exchange vows somewhere easily accessible with all your peeps. Then, we’ll head off to the mountains or cliffs for some epic pics while your friends and fam stay back and cruise🤙.
4. Can we still have a wedding toast or reception?
Just because you’re having a non-traditional wedding without a big customary reception, doesn’t mean you can’t incorporate fun traditions. Whether it’s just the two of you, a literal few select guests, or a dozen of your closest friends, you can absolutely still have a wedding toast (and reception!).
Regardless of your wedding size, another idea is to ask family and friends who won’t be there in person to write you toasts. You can read them together, either just the two of you or as a group and even record or stream it to share the experience with those who can’t be there. We also recently found out about this super cool video app called Capsule, which lets people who can’t be at your elopement record fun videos and send them to you!
5. Can we have an elopement weekend with our family and friends?
YES! Actually, please do! Instead of the “blur” of a traditional wedding that lasts just a few hours, why not have an incredible, adventure-filled elopement weekend for your inner circle?
This allows you to have both the epic, adventurous, and intimate elopement experience you’re dreaming of while also including your closest loved ones.
I suggest planning a few adventures everyone can enjoy together, such as renting ATVs, going river rafting, or hiking, and also building in downtime for guests to explore on their own. 😍
We partner with several amazing properties that make this EASY PEASY, offering private accommodations along with community spaces in epic locations (like just outside national parks!), so you can keep all your friends and fam together. Many even offer things like onsite bicycle rentals and spa services, and will even plan activities for your group! Here are a few recommendations for places that are perfect for eloping with family and friends, in some of the places we shoot most often:
ROAM Beyond - Glacier location, Montana
Bodhi Farms - Bozeman, Montana
Chipeta Solar Springs Resort - Ridgway, Colorado
Tiny Camp - Sedona, Arizona
East Zion Resort - Orderville, Utah
Timber + Tin - Kanab, Utah
The Camp - Bend, Oregon
Out n’ About Treehouses - Cave Junction, Oregon
Whether it’s eloping with family only or you’re considering bringing your whole squad out, reach out and let us know what you have in mind! We’re stoked and loaded with ideas to make it AWESOME!🤘🤘🤘
